Time Flies

Time flies. It seems just a few months ago I was making this blog. I know it has actually been a few years. Time used to go so slowly, now it flies by. Too fast.

Standard Certified Teacher!!!

I did it! I did it! I did it! I completed all my requirements and am now eligible for my standard teacher certification! I have to pay my fee, get fingerprinted and then I should be ready to go. I have to say I am so very proud of myself. So many times I am such a strong starter and finish weakly. But this time, this time...........Not only did I start strong, I finished even stronger! A new sense of self confidence. This is much needed as I begin the interview processes and finding a job!

End of One Chapter, Beginning of an Other

In merely 3 days, I will finish my student teaching! I can't believe it. I am so close. And then with the completion of my professional portfolio and a presentation; I will be finished! I will be a Certified Teacher! I feel and impending sense of accomplishment. But wait............not so fast. I then will be looking for a job. (Actually I have already been looking for one.) I haven't had a job interview in 9 years. I had my first 2 interviews last week with the same school system & don't really know how to feel about it. I feel as though i did ok, but don't really know. I know that God has a place for me, I am just not very good about waiting to find out. I do better when I have concrete plans. Even though through the past year, my hubby leaving a job of over 9 years for a better opportunity that ended up being about 4 months of hard work only to be let go because they decided to close the office and him then having the great job opportunity that he currently holds...................I had a great peace during the whole ordeal. But I would really rather just have a script that I can read to know what is next. Prepare that way. Alas, that is not the way life goes. So by the next time I post, hopefully I will have a job!!!!!!

Student Teaching

I started my student teaching this past Monday. It is great. I love my cooperating teacher and am learning a lot of things. It is different from substituting. Better. I know before the day of what I will be doing. More time to prepare and feel prepared. Right now I am doing 6th grade math. 2 regular math classes and 2 accelerated math classes. Tomorrow I will be teaching one class period! I am pretty excited about that. I now have to end my short "break time" and get dinner decided on and made, as well as do some laundry, on top of doing my student teaching homework all while needing to moistuize in the worst way!!!! This is my life. Oh yeah, I also need to be sure and spend that quality time with the girls and hubby. Hear about their days, tell them about mine. I'll sleep much, much, much, much later.

Another Year, Another Year

Well, I just had my 37th birthday on Dec 16. The strange thing is..............I still feel like I am in my 20's! I don't look like I did then (unfortunately) but I still feel the same. Sometimes I forget that I am staring 40 in the face. Especially when I am at home by myself, listening to music, cleaning, doing laundry.................things I have done for years. But now I am doing it all for a husband and 8 and 6 year old daughters as well as myself. So things are growing, I am growing in my life, in who I am; but I still feel YOUNG! So now I have a challenge for myself. To look on the outside how I feel on the inside. Young, vibrant and healthy. Things I want for myself that will directly impact my husband and 2 precious girls. Songs have really been speaking to me the past few months. I truly think God uses them to comfort and encouragement as I walk this path of life. Anyway the song is "I Wish" by Point of Grace. It says "wish I was doin' better with all the things that matter.........." and "to make a better life for my baby girl!" This is my wish......my prayer and I know this 37th year is going to be AMAZING!!!! Watch out........things are going to be happening. I hope to be and encouragement to others.
LIVE LIFE ON PURPOSE.

Here are the lyrics to the "I Wish" song. May they encourage and speak to you as it did for me!

I wish I didn't feel so helpless
I wish I didn't act so selfish
I wish I didn't wring my hands night and day
My hair was a little bit smoother
My jeans fit a little bit looser
And I always knew the right things to say
And I wish I wouldn't hide what's been going on inside
And I wish you wouldn?t get scared and run away

Chorus
I wish I was doing better
With all the things that matter,
I guess I got some learning to do
I wish everyone had someone
To hold em and to love em
The way I'm always gonna love you
I wish wishes came true

I was there was a cure for cancer
I wish somebody had an answer
And all God's children, never got hurt
I wish Eve never bit that apple
You men never went to battle
And I didn't get so mad at the world
I wish I was more like Jesus
And could pick up all the pieces
And make a better life for my baby girl

Chorus
I wish I was doing better
With all the things that matter,
I guess I got some learning to do
I wish everyone had someone
To hold em and to love em
The way I'm always gonna love you
I wish wishes came true
For everything I am wishing
I know someone up there is listening
So, I say my prayers when I go to bed
Ahh, ahh, ahh
Oh pray my wishes come true
Oh
Chorus
I wish I was doing better
With all the things that matter,
I guess I got some learning to do
I wish everyone had someone
To hold em and to love em
The way I'm always gonna love you
I wish wishes came true
I know wishes come true
I wish, I wish

Just When I Think I Have Things Figured Out......

Just when I think I have everything figured out..............I realize I do not. In the span of a weekend I lost the security of my Mama Phillips and the security of my husbands job. My grandmother passed away last night. She was an amazing woman who has such a legacy of Love for her family and for her God. I miss her already. My husband lost his job, and the anger/fear/anxiety I expect to feel are not there. I have instead a peace that God has something in store for us. Don't get me wrong, I am not happy about this.......but I am peaceful. And as John Waller sings in his song I Am Waiting..............I am waiting on you Lord, and I am hopeful. Though it is painful, but patiently I will wait. I will move ahead bold and confident, taking every step in obedience. While I'm waiting, I will will serve you. While I'm waiting I will worship. I will not fade, I'll be running the race even while I wait. We ask for your prayers as we wait. Peacefully.

Where is the manual?

Why, oh why didn't our children come with a manual? A place where we can look at the troubleshooting chart and have a few options for each situation. Here I am. Flying out here not know which end is up sometimes. Did my parents feel like this? I must call again and let them know how much I love them and how sorry I am for......................so many things. This age is hard for me, 8 and 6. I am really good with the babies and good with the tween to teenagers; it is this time between the two I am struggling with. Well, my 6 year old just gave me a big unsolicited hug. The aftermath of a meltdown can can be brutal. (Her meltdown, not mine! yet!) I feel so helpless sometimes and want so badly to..............know what they need. From life, from me. I must get on to get dinner together. I am praying God will show me what to do and how to just be.